Category Archive: Uncategorized

Aug 14

Loss Planning

I haven’t figured out how to breathe into this newness. I thought I had planned for this reality: my teen gone on and off for most of 4 weeks. I mean, you can plan for loss, right? Wrong. The ache in my chest feels as real as my daughter’s empty room. I thought if I …

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Jul 31



  I am alone and hungry. I eat the leftover puff pancake cold and drink the temperate coffee. I want to vacuum the whole house, remove the dust and debris that’s gathered in the months since we vacuumed. All of summer swept up into the vacuum bag, the record of time passing to be tossed …

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Jun 26

The Music Plays On

Love is the wallpaper I want to paste on my walls. I picture the print as gorgeous fleur-de-lis pattern, solid silvers and grey-blue swirls on an off-white background. So upstanding and righteous and out of reach. The way I would need to breath to keep that paper intact as I lifted it to my wall …

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Jun 21

The Head & The Heart

I practice telling myself my Annie’s problems are not problems until the phrase “not a problem” becomes a mantra. It’s a mantra I need because my brain loves to think I have many unsolvable problems. I’m not sure if this ability to see everything as crisis is genetic or learned. That I’m even wondering about …

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Jun 13

Summer Begins

There is no rhythm to the summer schedule. Or if there is, it’s too tiny for me to hear it so soon. There is one small stone after another, some on the floor of the house, some in my pocket gathered from the shores of the Strait of Juan de Fuca. It sounds so glorious …

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Jun 06

The School Year Ends

I’m sitting in the rectangle of light made by the beams’ ends that come through my window and rest on the floor. After four days of not exercising first thing, I managed 15 minutes on my bike in the basement this morning. It sounds so of the times and annoying to say it helps. It …

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Jun 02

Freshman Year Ends

I feel bone weary and sweaty. My mind alternately races and rests, and I catch it and make it lay still. Caroline is done with her freshman year of school. These years wear the face of a clock. My hands are sticky and I don’t know what comes next. Abigail Thomas’ book title runs through …

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Apr 11

Monday Morning Sunlight

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If I just stand on the blacktop all day long soaking up the right now sunlight, well, I know the clouds will come and cover up the sun. But if I stand in the embrace of long friendship for as long as possible, I will be heard. I will know all this searching I have …

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Mar 23

Whooshing Down that Mountain


  Is there time enough to learn how to twist wires into a shape of myself? A Facebook friend asked via post, “How do I slow down time?” By capturing sunlight on your face and noticing it. OK, really, I can’t slowdown time. This week, I read a few lines in a novel by Julia …

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Mar 16

Written On My Reflection


Hello again. I must admit that after my long absence, I’m not sure how to inhabit my blog anymore. For years, I’ve toyed with the idea of posting my poems here. My friend Rosemerry Wahtola Trommer has such a lovely daily poetry website. But I’m not sure. What I do know is this: I want …

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