Sunlight Arrives

The rays of sunlight hit the left side of my face. I know what day it is because I get to help my daughter with her schoolwork. I’m unfolding into quarantine like everyone else. With tears. Gratitude. Anger. Scrolling on social media too much and then forgiving myself. Because if I can’t be kind to […]

Run to the Sea

I saw a neighbor dad explaining to his daughter how the rain water goes into the sewer and travels to be cleaned at the plant by Discovery Park before it’s released to Puget Sound and suddenly I couldn’t breathe. The dad looked sheepishly at me, almost embarrassed by his talk, and all I could hear […]

I draw the bath

I draw the bath   by Nancy Schatz Alton “I am the patient gardener of the dry and weedy garden… I am the stone step, the latch, and the working hinge…” -Jane Kenyon   Abby prefers the nearly dead orchid to an easy succulent. Me, I’ll take the hens & chicks every time — captivated by […]

Make Me A River

You both crossed over long ago. When I was close to that crossing, I made it matter daily. I held the babies to me and really believed in God. I sucked in the sweetness of their skin; I thought perhaps that fickle God took two adults but gave me two babies. Years later, when I […]

The Moon Is Mine

I’m waiting for the carpet installer to arrive. I’m thinking about how fall smells: sweet. How fall feels: a heavy, muggy warmth that heats up my skin while the cool breeze cools me down. Often the sky is an amazing blue. This last week, the moon has been starting her cycle as a sliver that […]

Departure + Arrival

I’m home & I’m alone My mind plans & texts My pictures speak I hang the picture of Chris & David above my desk My husband as a child: his joyful smile arrives above my desk His brother whom I hardly know stares at the camera He’s tall and thin, his jeans speak of the […]

The Summer Of

It’s the summer of sesame seeds, the summer of the smaller fridge, of fruit next to veggies, of adventure next to quiet, of the new job and heartache, of letting go because holding tight isn’t even an option. It’s the summer of the old friend who says he’s glad life is going well. Life is […]

Growth

It’s strange to be in my office working. Strange to look at my bulletin boards: quotes and drawings and pictures of my family. There’s a painting by Chris that sits at my eye-level. It’s a woman looking down, intent on her work. I am intent about my work. I carefully place these quotes and drawings […]

Red

The days grow brighter. Some mornings I believe all will be well (if I only glance sideways at the news). If I rest my gaze on my girls who grow solid in their centers. They show me themselves. They rest in knowing I like them. If I only glance here, I think hooray—we are doing […]

June

The breeze is full of cold water straight from the Sound. There’s s concentric ring around the sun. Ice crystals make a faded rainbow The sun makes a mark on the red umbrella. The girls are away making their way away from me. This always feels good. I am satisfied knowing they are off being […]